The increase in the water bill for laundering extremely sweat-stained clothes has been budgeted.
The anti-chafe cream has been applied.
The nutrition plan that I will most likely not follow has been written.
And the training schedule has been posted on the fridge.
Three words.
I. Am. Scared.
Three more words?
Stupidest.Idea.Ever
(And yes, people, I am completely aware that stupidest is not proper grammar. But I am still delirious after reviewing what I have ahead of me for the next four months)
I am starting out slow.......
June 7 - 3 miles
June 8 - 3 miles
June 9 - 3 miles
June 10 - rest
June 11 - 6 miles
But then I flash to September.......
Sept. 13 - 5 miles
Sept. 14 - 10 miles
Sept. 15 - 5 miles
Sept. 16 - rest
Sept. 17 - 20 miles
WHAT THE F*&% WAS I THINKING?!
I was awake at 1:30pm (still in shock from staring at the months ahead) when Officer Bob returned home from his strenuous job. After the conversation that followed his arrival, I am 98% sure he also fears the weeks leading up to the bucket list dream from you know where. Running sometime makes me tired. Fatigue sometimes causes an increase in crankiness. An increase in crankiness usually leads to Officer Bob questioning his decision to co-habitate with me.
As sorry as you feel for my stupidity, you should feel even worse for what this man will have to endure during the coming months.
Oh....and then I have to sit and read stories like this sent from fellow runners. (I use the word "fellow" like I would totally fit in with "that" crowd without being totally awkward and giggling when talking about bleeding nipples. HA! Gets me every time!) A fellow runner sent me this article on how a bleepin' eight year old finished a half marathon.
I would like to highlight the parts of the article that totally ruined my self-esteem for the remainder of this week.
- "I thought it was going to be harder," said Katarina, who averaged a 9:18 mile throughout most of the race before slowing down near the end.
- So what was the toughest part of the journey? "Trying to get around the people who were blocking my way," she said.
NOW......I NEED TO CONSISTENTLY REMIND MYSELF.......
After recent family struggles, there is no better and more meaningful time in my life to run this race for such a GREAT CAUSE. Please consider helping me in this dream. I truly looking forward to taking step after step forward. Step after step towards scratching off the bucket list dream of all dreams. Through all the cursing and ranting, please know that I am doing this for a reason. Not only for myself, but also for something deeper.
2 comments:
It is NOT a stupid dream! You will train hard, think positively, and attain your goal just like you have in all the other endeavors you have set out to accomplish.
That being said, I had the marathon on my bucket list. By mile 11 of the half I decided that I know my body's limits and 13 miles it. I'm okay with letting that dream go because I will live it vicariously through you.
As for that insane 8 year old, good for her but of course it seemed easy. She doesn't have the burden of carrying around 10 extra pounds of boobage like some of us more veteran runners. I'd like to check back in with her one full time job, 2 c-sections, a house to maintain, and 24 additional years of assorted aches and pains later and see how she reacts.
Okay, I just watched the video and now I feel bad for talking bad about this little superstar. I'm not sure how I feel about letting an 8 year old run that many miles (not that I have to worry about that tough parenting dilemma seeing has how 3 miles of walking left one of my daughters basically incapacitated the remainder of the day and the other was acting as if she were on death's doorstep a mere mile past the start), but good for her. And she is right - try to get around slower runners among a crowd of thousands when you're running your own race is super annoying.
It's also super annoying that she beat my time by one second (I would have killed myself to make sure she didn't cross before me if I had been running with her - pride is a terrible beast). Now feel the need to add some Justin Bieber to my running play list.
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