Officer Bob is finishing up his
month of "staycation" on Saturday, and I never thought I would say this, but I will be sad to see him go.
In case I wasn't clear, I did say MONTH. As in 1/12 of a year. How does this happen you may ask? Officer Bob does not believe in sick days. He does not believe in scheduling appointments during normal working hours. Our lives revolve around
his work schedule because God forbid I ever make him request a day off for something as important as OUR WEDDING. This type of work ethic leads to several days of "use or lose" time in which Officer Bob shockingly requested ALL days off in a row. When you only work 14 days in a month due to 12 hour shifts, I guess it is completely possible to leave your career for 30 days straight. (Just so you know......this will never happen for someone like me. I believe in sick days. Wholeheartedly.)
During his time off, I kinda sorta think my fiance has become
domestic.
I can't tell you how or when this transformation occurred, but it happened. It seriously happened. I will be sad to see him go for my own selfish reasons.
The yard has experienced a total overhaul (mowing, trimming, weeding, pruning, and all other landscape related verbs). The carpet has been vacuumed on a
regular basis, the kitchen floor has been scrubbed, the laundry has somehow folded itself and landed nicely in my dresser drawers, and I have had a delicious hot dinner waiting for me EVERY night of his break from the working world.
Now I know several of you are questioning the amount of nagging this man had to have endured to ensure these tasks were completed, and I would like to answer those suspicions.
NONE.
ZILCH.
ZERO.
I never once asked him to complete any of the above.
(I did, however, request that the Christmas lights finally be removed from the exterior of our home as it was beginning to look like this Mexican celebrated Navidad every season of the year)
As if these tasks weren't evidence enough of his transition into Mr. Stewart, Officer Bob caused a minor stroke in his young fiance last night on our evening walk (that's right....we go on evening walks now like a real couple!) Officer Bob OFFERED - was not coaxed, nagged, or tricked - to BABYSIT a real life human baby BY HIMSELF on Saturday morning at OUR HOUSE. Now keep in mind the mother of this child will be within walking distance and the total length of said babysitting will last no longer than approx 1.5 hours. As noted before, baby fever has been in high alert at Casa de Bob due to adorable little nieces and little does he know, but Officer Bob's willingness to care for a 3 1/2 month old child in his own home has escalated the situation to a borderline DEFCON 4.
To Officer Bob:
I truly have enjoyed all this
quality time with you over the past few weeks. I realize that this crazy domestic man that has taken over your body will soon be leaving. However, know that I will NOT forget the joy he brought me and the stress he relieved during his short stay. I am sure you are ready to get back to protecting the community and ensuring the safety of your fellow man (*cough*
playing euchre and watching youtube videos *cough*). I appreciate your service and understand they need you too.
Your loving soon-to-be wife,
Big Boca Bob
P.S. I love you.
