For those of you without windows, a TV, or any need to have left your house over the last couple of days, let me bring you up to speed. Apparently Old Man Winter and Mother Nature had a bit of a lover's quarrel, and many of us unfortunate souls suffered for it. Snow wasn't the only thing to drastically fall during the Blizzard of 2011. My checking account also saw a quick decline due to the Snowpocalypse.
Two Personal Days From Work: $$$$$
Doctor's Bills For an Injured Back Attempting To Shovel This Crap: $0
(I love that Mama Dirt works for the doc. Hello free healthcare!)
Pain Meds/Muscle Relaxers for Aforementioned Injured Back: $18.83
(I forgot my damn insurance card!)
Hot Cocoa to Warm Up Officer Bob After He Took Over Shoveling Duties: $1.50
(He just looked so pitiful out in the cold....)
Window Cleaner To Clean The Windows that Reggie Is
Now Able to Stand and Lick Due To The 4ft Snow Drift: $4.29
Two Movie Rentals To Avoid Boredom: $6.00
Supplies Needed To Repair The Whole In The Wall
That Reggie Chewed Due To Cabin Fever:
Plaster: $6.99
Putty Knife: $2.00
Paint: $8.99
Fee For Service Snow Removal: $Check's In The Mail
(A Desperate Phone Call Made To Titty Baby and His Trusty Tractor.
The same Titty Baby that showed up at 7:00p.m. on Tuesday night
in the MIDDLE of the blizzard to start clearing a path in our driveway.
I'm sure his beard and mustache weren't the only two things to collect icicles.
This act in itself proves you aren't as racist as I thought you were, Titty Baby!)
Gas Station Pizza to Substitute Having To Actually Cook a Meal: $10.00
(Ten bucks for ONE damn pizza!
It isn't bad enough that gas itself costs an arm and a leg?
Just take another limb, BP!
Who needs two arms anyway! I've already mastered holding a fork with my toes)
New Garage Door: $493.00
(The old one was never exactly fixed from a previous "car meets door" incident
(which I will never live down......thanks Titty Baby).
Blizzard winds and 15" of snow pretty much finished it off. R.I.P. Garage door.
You were a piece of crap anyway!)
Two Quiet, Calm, Drama-Free Days Spent In My Pajamas Cuddling with My Boys and Completely Ignoring My Half-Marathon Training:
Priceless.......
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