Lunch Date #burritobeat2015 Day 64

This pretty little lady made my lunch break much more giggly and sunshiney today. 

Thanks for the apple slice smiles, CareBear and Pebbles!

#burritobeat2015 Day 49

Woman Crush Wednesday! 

Shoutout to all these tias! What fabulous role models for our little Bobbie Burrito......keep it classy ladies!

#burritobeat2015 Days 39, 40, & 41

Day 39:  

Sergeant Bob and I got to revisit our wedding venue for a little afternoon date. A viewing of American Sniper from the theater balcony made for the perfect Mommy/Daddy outing. Added bonus - Grandma Dirt manages said movie theater. Can you say free popcorn? Sergeant Bob sure can.....two large popcorn bags of thanks to Grandma Dirt for free babysitting services!

Day 40:

Bobbie Burrito closet overhaul. We are officially wearing 9mo onesies now - mostly for width rather than height. Family genes are NOT in her favor. It's cute now.....I'm avoiding telling her that will wear off eventually.  Shout out to the Mrs. And CareBear for basically supplying Bobbie's entire wardrobe for her first year of life.

Day 41:

Supplies for winter swim lessons have been purchased. Bobbie Burrito cannot wait to splash her little heart out and though swimsuits this time of year are pretty slim pickings, we were able to ensure she will look mighty adorable in her pink tutu while she does it. Big Boca Bob on the other hand had different purchases to make to prepare for the dreaded day........

#burritobeat2015 Day 34

Feliz Cumpleanos Tia CareBear!

To a woman who defines selflessness - an amazing woman with the power,  mind, and strength to tackle every obstacle in this crazy beautiful life. CareBear - it is my prayer that you go to sleep every night with the realization that you are every bit worth the blessings God has given you. The blessing of a house filled with loads of laundry, weeknights consumed with dinner making and doctor's visits, sleepless nights preparing for the stress of the day ahead, and the blessing of endless love from two tiny beings who call you Mommy.

You never cease to amaze me by simply being you.

We love you CareBear. You deserve the happiest of birthdays and so much more.

The Wait Is Over

Actually, the wait was over last Thursday at exactly 12:34pm.

I have to keep my readers in suspense to make sure you are all still reading this silly thing. Most of you probably caught up with the news thanks to Aunt Mrs. over at One Carbon Hill (the punctual Aunt), but we  can always use a good dose of adorable baby photos. 

Introducing 8lbs 9oz and 20.25" of cuteness - Cayden Edwin Pokarney.

There are few things in life I know for certain, but I am confident in proclaiming the following facts.

• Big Sister Pebbles was made for her role as mentor and protector of this little guy.

• Mama CareBear and Daddy Titty Baby absolutely love when Aunt Llama and Aunt Big Boca Bob spend approximately 8 hours entertaining each other in the hospital room. We are the funniest people we know and we are not shy in sharing that message.
• This family of four shares a love that can match no other. When Officer Bob and I decide to start a family of our own, they will serve as inspiration for the true meaning of the word. I am grateful for the opportunity to sit back and watch them grow in their own happiness. Thank you for letting me be a tiny part of your magical world.

Passing The Time Waiting For The Brother of Pebbles

Yo.

Pebbles's Brother.

I'm talking to you.

Hurry up and get out here.

I am running out of things to occupy my time waiting for your arrival. While not so patiently waiting, I have realized the following:

1. Amazing Sidewalk Art Amazes Me - Simply Amazing

2. My Christmas List this year has exactly one item - a sleeping bag with legs. Yes. Please.

3. Ellen and I have been, currently are, and always will be BFFs.

Okay - so they may not be GREAT accomplishments, but I would like to think I am using my time wisely. I also decorated the house for holiday festivities. Officer Bob loves this time of year (note: sarcasm).

In conclusion, the suspense is killing me.

Let's go baby boy. Aunt Big Boca Bob is ready to do some cuddling :)

Fall Traditions

In case I haven't mentioned it before, I HEART FALL.

I heart the smell.
I heart the sound.
I heart the feel.
I heart the taste.

Fall is a sensory overload and I seriously can't get enough of it.

I believe my affinity for this specific season can be attributed to Mama Dirt and her sense of tradition. I was raised in a family that went apple picking every year the leaves began to change. We would watch football every Friday night, cook hot dogs over an open fire in the backyard, and engage in the sport of competitive pumpkin carving. I thank you, Mama Dirt, for making the time to let us breathe in the brisk fall air for I now get to share those experiences with new generations.

Unfortunately, I was unable to attend this year's apple picking trip with Huracan and his little bean burrito offspring, but the pictures I received via text message let me be a part of the action. It was reported that Beans was quite the determined little picker as she huffed and puffed and tugged at each apple within reach. Mama Dirt was forced to purchase more than a couple bushels as the stubborn Beans would just not quit. She will make a faithful employee someday. I love that girl to pieces.

This past weekend, CareBear, Titty Baby, Pebbles, Officer Bob, and I loaded up in the trusty blaze and made the trip to the orchard. The King and Niepoetter families completed our happy little caravan. We ventured out early Sunday morning. It would have been early Sunday morning had church not forced yours truly to hold up the trip. My tardiness was forgiven as there is obviously no competing with the Big Guy upstairs. In my absence from Pebbles lately, I have earned a new name. Her father has convinced Pebbles that I am "Brown Bear". Cute, huh? Yeah.....I didn't think so either. I guess there are worse things to which I could be compared. You know the saying - "Better to be a Brown Bear than a Titty Baby!"

Highlights from the trip include the following:

• Even at 8 months pregnant, CareBear is a fearless full of energy Mama.
• I love other people's kids (most of the time). The cuteness is overwhelming.
• Other people's kids are even cuter when they call me Mrs. Febuh.
• Pebbles is an independent woman who can not and will not be contained to being carried in single file lines. She needs to be given the freedom to fly on her own terms. Even if these terms mean riding on the footrest of a stroller in a very crowded orchard market.
• Officer Bob's friends are quietly funny. Just like him. It makes me happy.
• I don't like llamas. (Sorry Tina.) I just don't see the draw in these spitting smelly animals nor do I want to pay 25 cents to feed them tiny green pellets. Gross.
• I need to kick the habit of forgetting my camera when engaging in family traditions. These memories need to be captured.  
• Pumpkin picking is the perfect activity for an independent two year old ready to make grown up decisions like big pumpkin vs. wittle pumpkin. In case you were wondering, wittle pumpkin won.
• Titty Baby and I have the same sense of humor and we will always be funny. Always.

Officer Bob and I finished the weekend by watching football and drinking hot chocolate. Love.

"Autumn - the year's last, loveliest smile." - William Cullen Bryant

P.S. I am contemplating enrolling in PSLAA (Pumpkin Spice Latte Addicts Anonymous) Who's with me?

BREAKING NEWS!

If your summer is anything comparable to the happenings at Casa de Bob, I'm sure you can sympathize with my lack of blogging time. The days get busier, but the excitement keeps building.

And that my friends is what leads me to this post..............

I am currently interrupting your summer fun to bring you this SUPER BIG ANNOUNCEMENT. Pebbles and her adorable little piggy tails have some news to share:

No - your vision is not failing you. Pebbles can hold her excitement no more. This only child expires November of 2013 and I know SEVERAL family members who are anxiously awaiting Baby Gremlin's arrival. Titty Baby once again gave himself the task of creating the in utero name for his offspring and he has settled on the title Gremlin. I think I can see the Titty Baby resemblance! :)

 

 

Unfortunately, I am already failing as an aunt in the realm of Gremlin blog time. His older sister will start to rub it in his face if I don't make up for lost time by incorporating the kilbasa bearing child into more written word. That and the consistent pressure from his mother has got me pecking away at the keyboard once again.

I am making a vow to Gremlin here and now as witnessed by blog readers both near and far. I solemnly swear to post AT LEAST once a week for the remainder of the summer in an effort to allow the unborn hairball to build as much fame as his older sister. It won't be easy. Some posts may fail to impress, but I WILL do it. Are you happy now, CareBear?!

"Gremlin Gab" has been initiated. Follow-ups can and will be expected.

Happy Summer Bloggers!

Photos/Stories As Promised

Better Late Than Never!

Three Things

1. Getting married is like a 6 month constant party of fun.
2. My Matron and Maid of Honors are the best! :)
3. Mama Dirt rocks too.

Decorations for the bachelorette party were themed, raunchy, and abundant. No worries....I have refrained from posting MOST inappropriate pictures - and believe me when I say there were many.

 

Mama Dirt and Dancing Queen were in charge of fashion design for the evening, and I pulled off one heckuva rockstar bachelorette look thanks to their attention to detail and pristine sewing abilities.

 

Prior to dinner, I of course had to snack on a few appetizers. CareBear's words of wisdom - "they don't really taste like that."  



 

Unfortunately, I have absolutely no pictures from dinner although time spent at the restaurant far exceeded all other events of the night. Here's some highlights:

 

•  Cocktails were plentiful - delicious, flavored, multi-colored cocktails.
• Mama Dirt ordered the following item from the menu: “The Bastacolli” Sausage, meatballs, pepper and mushrooms in a rich marinara over penne pasta and baked with mozzarella and parmesan cheese. You eat it all and receive a Free Basta’s Tee Shirt!
•  Mama Dirt received an extra large take-home bucket of mostacolli and no tee shirt.
• Several talkative females surrounding a dinner table resulted in NO pause in conversation for a straight 2.5 hours.
• The waiter only spilled one bowl of pasta on the floor - pretty good when you consider the distraction of all the fine ladies surrounding him.

Following dinner, the ladies retreated to the party suite for a few phallic treats including but not limited to cake, cupcakes, popsicles, suckers, etc. Even Mama Gin got in on the action. (By the way....Mama Dirt must have had some rockin' party days because she can cook up some delightfully delicious jello shots with a special kick.)

 



 

Gifts followed dessert, and due to my family/friends incredibly inappropriate gift giving, I have no pictures for your viewing pleasure. What happened to the good 'ol days of lingerie gift giving? My family/friends instead chose to gift and RE-gift an entire collection of adult films featuring quite the diverse population of actors/actresses. The Llama should really spend more of her time molding the young minds of the girls she nannies and less time wasting money in the porn crane game at the local watering hole. 

Games Followed Gifts:

First on the list? Banana Ring Toss.

Despite this display of impeccable technique and form, I did not earn the title of Banana Ring Toss champion.

 

 Unfortunately for Liz, the hands-on-hip technique also did not result in victory.

 

 

I'm sure by now you have all noted the naked man in the background of the previous posted photos. Per tradition, the night included a rousing game of Pin the Junk on the Hunk.

 

A lack of blindfold resulted in Bob's Bachelorette Boa as a form of vision blocking. The Llama made a good move.

 

Mrs. E struggled slightly.

 

And Goldie walked away with the title. I think it was due to her "good luck" guide from behind.

 

Following games, the girls headed out for a little casino action. Monetary breakdown is as follows: Everyone lost money EXCEPT for the lucky mother of twins. She was lucky enough to survive delivery of two beautiful boys and her luck continued at the slots.

 

Following a depressing loss of finances, the girls headed back to a little relaxation and skin rejuvenation. It takes work to look this good.

 

A HUGE thanks to all those in attendance!

 

Only 13 more days until the real party starts!



Crazy Little Thing Called Life

Things you missed in my absence:

Officer Bob celebrated his 28th birthday.


He's pretty cute. I'm considering marrying him next month. He acts more like he's 15 than in his late 20's. He enjoys making fun of his soon-to-be wife, playing PS3 until the wee hours of the morning, and making funny faces.

 Huracan Ramirez celebrated his 29th birthday.


He's kinda OK in the looks department. I'm considering calling him next month. He acts more like he's 21 than in his late 20's. He enjoys making fun of his favorite sister, playing guitar until the wee hours of the morning, and making even funnier faces.

CareBear celebrated her 29th birthday.


She's beautiful both inside and out. I'm considering officially making her my sister next month. She acts her age. She enjoys making a fool of herself in costume at bridal showers, chasing after her adorable daughter, and proving her husband wrong.

• I sprained my back tying tags on wedding favors. Is that normal?
• The birthday boys and a few tag-a-longs (Big Boca Bob included) celebrated their aging process with a ski trip in Wisconsin. Everyone survived. There were no broken bones. Broken egos? That's another story.
• Mary Poppins, Juno, and Elle Woods threw me a Star-Studded Bridal Shower with guests including Tom Cruise, Liz Taylor, The Cat in the Hat, Forrest Gump, Indiana Jones, Super Girl, Two members of the Clampett family, Wilma and Pebbles Flintstone, Olivia Newton John, Jovie the Elf, Katniss Everdeen, and Jennifer Beals just to name a few. Zach Galifianakis even made a guest appearance dressed in his famous role as Alan (baby Carlos included). Several pictures were taken and will be posted soon. It was a BLAST!
• I filed my taxes. It's ok to be jealous.
• After looking at the February and March calendar, I realized the schedule of The Bob's could not be any more ridiculous/confusing.
• Just when I thought life couldn't get any busier - it did - and I like it.

.

 

 

The Resemblance is Uncanny

Pebbles.......

I used to think you inherited everything from of your father and your father only.
However, after taking a closer look, the evidence has proven there is really no denying that CareBear is your mother.

Don't see it yet?

Let's take a closer look.

Yup.

She's yours.

 

Dear Titty Baby and CareBear,

This past weekend made me realize that

 I love you.

Not in a creepy "I want to have your babies" kind of way, but more in a "I totally respect you and admire you" kind of way.

Titty Baby -

I'm not sure I have ever met a man as hard working as you. You are a proud husband and father who is determined to provide the best life possible for your wife and daughter. I can't begin to imagine the blood, sweat, and possibly tears that you have poured into renovating your humble abode over the past few months, but do know that this slightly overweight brown girl is TOTALLY IMPRESSED. You have made that house a home and you should give yourself one helluva pat on the back.

Care Bear -

Life is full of crazy twists and turns (especially since you decided to marry a man who would sell his mother for a perky profit), but you just go along for the ride. I am amazed at your poise and positive attitude. Sure - there are tears and yelling (some days more than others), but you hold your head high and keep routine for that adorable little girl I call my niece. Sacrifices are made and hours are spent questioning life decisions, but you should be very proud of the home you have put together and the family you are raising. Most of all, I applaud you for maintaining your sense of humor through it all. (i.e. skipping through a Kohl's parking lot at 1:00am with your soon to be Mexican sista)

And to you both -

This weekend was proof to me that I am not the only one who sees all of these amazing qualities. You have surrounded yourself with this incredible support system of family and friends that creep out of the woodwork when duty calls. We may be a little dysfunctional as a group - OK....ALOT dysfunctional - but that diverse crazy crew you call "friends" is a total reflection of the two of you. Thank you for proving to me that love, loyalty, and hard work truly does pay off. You have to get your hands dirty to be successful, but the payout is truly rewarding.

I love your loyalty.
I love your dedication to family.
I love my little(ish) Pebbles.
I love Officer Bob for allowing me to become a part of your lives.
And I. Love. You.


P.S. Titty Baby - this sentimental attitude is most likely going to be short lived. Please don't go thinking I actually like you or anything. Tomorrow I will go back to repeatedly making fun of your cracka ass like its my j-o-b.

My Name Is Big Boca Bob

And it has been two weeks since my last entry.


The Llama's wedding has jumped straight to the top of my "things to do" list. There are crafts to be completed, ribbons to be tied, candy dishes to be filled, musical duets to be rehearsed and one bride-to-be to keep stress free. The last item might become the most difficult to accomplish in the coming weeks.
Twenty-seven days and counting until The Llama becomes a Mrs., and if her bachelorette festivities last night serve as a preview for the wedding events, I can assure you it will be one heck of a camo sportin', ol glory drankin', cowboy boot stompin' party. Thanks CareBear for providing a fabulous girls night out and thanks Daisy Duke for providing most of the entertainment for the evening. :)

As my hobbies as a party planner, dance recital coordinator, and wedding diva become a full-time job, Officer Bob and the boys have felt a little neglected - and they aren't afraid to show that they are utterly unimpressed with my lack of free time.

Luckily, Officer Bob has stepped up to the plate to share a little extra quality father-son bonding time with the boys.

I honestly don't know what I would do without him..................





Oh wait......nevermind..........
I would sleep in my own bed!


Please excuse my part-time demotion of blogging on my priority list. I promise to move it up the list immediately right in between folding laundry and vaccuming the carpet I'm sure is hiding under days of dog hair.

Don't give up on me yet, blog readers! The fun is just starting!

Poor Pebbles

This past weekend, I enjoyed a nice trip a few miles up north to celebrate the soon-to-be Mrs. Llama at her bridal shower. Fun times were had by all, and although I have yet to take a look at all the photos snapped, I can assure you the bride-to-be looked as beautiful as ever.

Serving as Maid of Honor, CareBear supplied the games for the festivities. The "raid your purse" game produced many giggles as well as a moment of clarity for myself.

As I was not so graciously scavenging through my lady baggage in an effort to locate and/or cheat my way through the prepared list (I tend to be competitive), I located this little gem of a photo:

While there is no questioning the amount of love we all share for Pebbles, it became clear to me that this sweet little child is truly lacking in the area of "mature" female role models. This is evident in photo #3 above in which poor little Pebbles is clearly questioning the antics of her Gramma Poke and Aunt Big Boca Bob. I also believe in photo #1, she may be attempting a quick getaway from the "crazy" surrounding her.

I apologize for the radiating immaturity of the women in your life, Pebbles. However, there may still be hope that you won't turn out like one of the goons above. Perhaps the Mrs. or Mimi Daisy Duke can pull through for you. To save you much embarrassment in the future, I'll keep my fingers crossed.

Camera Found

FUN PHOTOS AS PROMISED.........

Pre-race Face

We're going to a race.

We're gonna win first place.

You have an ugly face!

Prior to listening to Dancing Queen complain

about her digestive system for 30 minutes

Running is fun!

And even more fun when you're running with Dancing Queen!

Easiest obstacle of the race?

The Gollywhopper!

Bad thing about going down

is somehow you have to get back up.

 I love meeting people at races.

This bride was getting married the same afternoon as the race.

I'm not so sure I'll be able to sway my bridal party

into an hour of torture on the morning of my wedding.

Post-race,

We survived.

And Dancing Queen found a restroom.

After a quick shower, it was off to wedding festivities.

And although Devin looked beautiful on her wedding day,

I believe this little girl may have stolen the show.

I seriously cannot get enough of Pebbles.

It's a sick obsession.

Sweetest moment of the evening?

Watching this adorable family of three share a dance.

CHECK BACK AFTER THIS WEEKEND

as I'm sure the photos will be much funnier and muddier.

Huracan, Dancing Queen, Big Boca Bob, and Shawnee

GUERREROS!

Beach Babies

Beach Baby

Beach Baby

 There on the sand.......

From July

til' the end of September

Note to Mama B and CareBear:
Keep the photos coming! I seriously cannot get enough of your adorable children in their summer wear. However.......the photos become slightly depressing when I realize I will be sporting the same beach body as my nieces this summer. Somehow the chub on my body is not nearly as cute as little baby rolls. Make sure my name is on the invite list to all events involving babies in swimwear during the months of June through September. Please and thank you.

Furthermore, due to your uncanny ability to create amazingly well-behaved beautiful children, baby fever (no pun intended) is in full bloom at Casa de Bob. Officer Bob is less than amused at my requests for serious conversation regarding the timeline of my child bearing years. I suppose I better get through this wedding thing first.

Who is going to have the cutest flower girls this side of the Rio Grande?

This girl!